Equality On TrialDOMA for Dummies: This Week in Prop 8 for Feb 28, 2011

DOMA for Dummies: This Week in Prop 8 for Feb 28, 2011

February 28, 2011

By mattymatt

9th Circuit Court of Appeals Background DOMA trials Prop 8 trial Right-wing Videos Weekly Summary

If ‘domination’ is your goal, NOM,... Anti-marriage constitutional amendment fails to...

871279 Comments2011-02-28+18%3A15%3A04mattymatt

1. Kathleen | February 28, 2011 at 3:18 am

√
2. Lesbians Love Boies | February 28, 2011 at 3:30 am

√ + 1
3. JonT | February 28, 2011 at 10:40 am

☮
4. Ed Cortes | February 28, 2011 at 3:23 am

me too – MORE mail!
5. Bob Barnes | February 28, 2011 at 3:35 am

OT: Karen Grube inspires HATE Group, Americans for Truth about Homosexuality

Yep, our little hate-wadd is busy with her after-work chores.
http://americansfortruth.com/news/letter-wont-din…
6. Bob Barnes | February 28, 2011 at 3:36 am

Be sure to support Chili’s Restaurants and Maggiano’s Little Italy.
7. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 3:50 am

I followed the link to their parent company listed in that article and sent them the following…

"Just wanted to drop you a note to say that if Karen Grube, of San Diego, California thinks you are evil, that is a GREAT reason for me to support you.

Please know that your support of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force is one of the reasons that I will not only sing your praises, but eat at your restaurants myself, whenever possible!

Keep up the good work, and ignore the bigots, please.

Thank you very much!"
8. Mark M - Seattle | February 28, 2011 at 5:30 am

I did as well….wanted to let them know that their continued support of Equaity gets them my families money. 🙂
9. LCH | February 28, 2011 at 6:00 am

I dropped them a note as well to thank them for their support, beside which Chili's buffalo wings are my guilty pleasure. : )

♀♀=♂♂=♀♂=∑♡
10. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 6:04 am

My sister-in-law and I have been known to drop in for dinner and margaritas. 🙂
11. Rhie | February 28, 2011 at 6:20 am

Hehe reminds me of the senator in MD who changed his mind when he realized just how evil the anti-equality side sounds.
12. Kate | February 28, 2011 at 7:00 am

Don't forget, folks, that On the Border was one of the places that the Vota Bus advertised as a public rally stop, and the owners of that particular franchise (I forgot where it was — Roseville, maybe?) didn't let them get away with it. Tomas et al had to punt and claim it was just a stop for the organizers.
13. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 7:08 am

Well, anytime anyone from here on P8TT is in Fayetteville, NC, there is a local chain that is very proud to be one of our allies, and I also recommend them because of their food, service and prices. Mi Casita is delicious! And I will personally take anhy of the P8TT family there when you are here in town if you like Mexican! Of course, the staff are all rather nice to look at also!
14. Judy | February 28, 2011 at 8:13 am

Yes, On The Border in Roseville let us sit at the next table over from the bus group and gave us a free appetizer.

Also, Cattleman's in Roseville has a gay manager who was delighted to talk with us about having a gay-friendly reception there.
15. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 8:23 am

Well, apparently when BZ and I do finally get to travel, we will have to visit Cattleman's in Roseville!
16. Ed Cortes | February 28, 2011 at 9:52 am

Roseville is a couple of hours from us – let me know, and we'll meet you there. Maybe Sheryl can join us, too!
17. fiona64 | February 28, 2011 at 3:51 am

Likewise On The Border and Macaroni Grill. 🙂

Love,
Fiona
18. Ed | February 28, 2011 at 3:44 am

Well, bless her heart 🙂
19. fiona64 | February 28, 2011 at 3:50 am

She is such an angry little wasp, isn't she?

I feel sorry for *anyone* that hate-filled.

Love,
Fiona
20. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 3:53 am

Yes… and while this is the same thing we are doing about Chick-Fil-A, we can also do what we can to counteract her work by sending letters of support in this case.
21. fiona64 | February 28, 2011 at 6:25 am

I don't recall any of us calling Chick-Fil-A disgusting …

I absolutely support anyone's right to boycott anywhere they choose, make no mistake. I just don't think we're anywhere near so … virulent … in our actions or words (for the most part).

Love,
Fiona
22. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 6:27 am

True… we do tend to be more civilized when we present our concerns.. Good point, and a point in our favor, I would say.

🙂
23. Ed | February 28, 2011 at 3:51 am

What an idiot…..On a side note…I wonder what kind of car she drives, as a lot of car makers (GM, Subaru, Ford especially) are very open and receptive to us. Or, does she drink? (Better stay away from Coors beer and Absolut vodka….). Does she watch tv, namely ABC, ESPN? I can go on and on, but I think ya'll see my point….
Thoughts?
24. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 3:55 am

We support those who support us, and boycott those who don't. Karen Grube does the same.

Let us hope that our support outweighs her boycott.
25. Ed | February 28, 2011 at 4:00 am

Or…..(and this one is great!) Does she listen to the radio?
http://www.clearchannel.com/Corporate/PressReleas…

LOL
26. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 5:44 am

Well, I guess I know where I will have BZ take me for my birthday dinner a week from tomorrow–Chili's!
27. Ronnie | February 28, 2011 at 6:13 am

Good…more ribs for me….I want my baby back, baby back, baby back…I want my baby back, baby back, baby back…I want my baby back, baby back, baby, back…..CHILIIIIIIIIIII'S….baby back ribs…….Barbecue Sauce!!!….<3…Ronnie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1l87Wzselg
28. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 6:52 am

Their ribs are not the only item on their menu that just totally rocks, either! They have some very wonderful things that we can eat that are still kosher! YAY!!!!!!!!!!
29. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 3:41 am

Is it too soon for me to be stockpiling some rice, just in case?

I just want to say that I love reading posts like this.
30. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 3:56 am

And those of us who are married are sending up all the positive energy and prayers we can send up that marriage equality will soon be the law of the land throughout all the United States from municipal level to county level to state to federal!
31. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 4:06 am

(tossing some virtual rice at Richard, just for good measure!)
32. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 4:09 am

And let's not forget the bird seed mixture for our married feathered friends out there!
33. Mark M - Seattle | February 28, 2011 at 4:28 am

You do know that throwing rice at weedings and the whole birds exploding thing is a myth right?
http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/birdrice….
34. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 4:34 am

Oh, yes, I know that. But I still want our fine feathered friends to eat well, so the more things we can throw that they can eat, the better I like it.
35. Mark M - Seattle | February 28, 2011 at 4:36 am

hehehehehehehehehe
36. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 5:04 am

Yep… the reason most places don't like throwing rice (or even birdseed, anymore) is that it is a pain to clean up after.

This is why bubbles have become the thing…
37. fiona64 | February 28, 2011 at 6:26 am

Caveat re: bubbles … some of them stain fabric. Be careful to get the non-staining kind.

Love,
Fiona (who was, briefly, one of those wedding coordinator people … before the Bridezillas drove her insane and she quit)
38. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 6:29 am

News to me, thanks!! I will keep that in mind.

And good for you, not putting up with bridezillas any more.
39. Ronnie | February 28, 2011 at 4:31 am

So much to catch up on….so subscribing & reading/watching later….on another note….Lady Gaga premiered her video for "Born This way" featuring Canadian male model, Rick Genest (aka skeleton- tattooed "Zombie Boy")……Gaga will be releasing a video of a stripped down acoustic version to raise money for charity.

I was "Born This Way"….Deal with it!!!!….<3…Ronnie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV1FrqwZyKw&fe…
40. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 5:33 am

OT but I just got this email from Eden and Change.org. Apparently ANPAC is not wanting to pay off what the policy calls for after an arson in Tennessee destroyed the dream home of a lesbian couple. I am signing this petition, and I thought I would pass it on in case anyone else here at P8TT wants to sign it.

Change.org

Demand that American National Property and Casualty pay lesbian arson victims

Sign the Petition

Dear Richard,

This is, quite simply, shocking and unbelievable. And it should not be happening in America.

Imagine celebrating an anniversary weekend with the love of your life, only to return home and find that your dream home has been burned to the ground in an anti-gay hate crime. Then imagine your insurance company indefinitely delaying payment on the damages.

That’s exactly what is happening to Carol Ann and Laura Stutte, a same-sex couple who have been together for more than 16 years, living in Tennessee.

In September, an arsonist destroyed their home to mere ashes, leaving only a garage standing. On the side of the garage, the arsonists spray-painted the word “QUEERS” in big, black letters. A month before the arson, Carol Ann and Laura received several homophobic threats, including being told by a neighbor:

“Do you know what is better than one dead queer? Two dead queers.”

Five months after their house was torched to the ground, Carol Ann and Laura have not received a single penny from their home insurance company — American National Property and Casualty (ANPAC). Facing financial disaster, the Stuttes have been forced to make mortgage payments and insurance payments — or else be dropped by the company.

This is outrageous and unacceptable, but you can do something about it. Right now, thousands of Change.org members are telling ANPAC to honor Carol Ann and Laura’s insurance claim — and help the victims of this vicious attack get back on their feet. Click here to join us and add your name now.

Despite the crippling financial strain on Carol Ann and Laura, ANPAC continues to stall on paying the couple’s claim – despite the fact that Carol Ann and Laura’s insurance policy says that they are entitled to up to 24 months of living expenses after a disaster — like having their home burned to the ground.

Why won’t ANPAC help Carol Ann and Laura recover from this hateful and homophobic attack on their home? We don’t know the answer, but — with the help of Change.org members across America — we’re going to get an answer from ANPAC.

Carol Ann and Laura need your support right now. Please click the link below to add your name and join thousands of Americans telling ANPAC to honor their policy and help the Stuttes rebuild their lives.
http://www.change.org/petitions/demand-american-n…

Thanks for taking action. Together, we’ll help Carol Ann and Laura hold ANPAC accountable.

– Eden and the Change.org team
41. Straight Dave | February 28, 2011 at 9:30 am

While I support all efforts to encourage/badger ANPAC into doing what they're obligated to, I think media exposure will have a much bigger impact. Bad publicity of an insurance company not paying off should cause potential customers to think twice, hopefully making ANPAC.even more uncomfortable. One of the national media outlets that has a consumer interests department might be willing to pick up the phone and ask some awkward questions
42. Rhie | March 1, 2011 at 9:49 am

Yup. And if the GOP says anything about how it's somehow wrong of us to do that we can just rightly point out that this is the other end of the free market. People are allowed to complain loudly and often.
43. Dave in ME | February 28, 2011 at 5:51 am

Me toO!

Dave in Maine
44. Bob | February 28, 2011 at 5:59 am

Lavi " we'll know have three branches of government working in unison all working towards the end of DOMA, again the executive branch declaring it unconstitutional, the congress working to repeal it, and the judiciary which so far struck it down as unconstitutional."

re congress and repeal,, he says any bill like this takes a lot of work to build support,,,

three branches of gov't with one goal,,, woot woot,,, surely we can get behind that,,,

glad all the gblt orgainzations pressured Obama to study DOMA,, keep up the good work,,,,
45. Canadian JAG Officer | February 28, 2011 at 6:25 am

Theres a lot of interesting article talking about the DOMA trap set by Obama, Im really interested to see if the republicans take up the defence of DOMA what they will do as in this article: http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_d…

They will want to spew their vile in order to energize their base but those arguments simply wont fly in court and will get them smacked down and if they go soft their base will smack em down for not putting forward arguments any better then Obama did, I think hes stuck then in a bit of a trap which will make it fun to watch them squirm! haha
46. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 6:31 am

Especially as Feinstein is introducing legislation to repeal DOMA. Imagine, if you will, the legislation passes while the Republicans are still fighting it in court.

That is a picture that just makes me grin, thinking about it.
47. DaveP | February 28, 2011 at 6:38 am

Perhaps I'll email those Republicans a 'sad trombone' sound effect the day DOMA gets repealed : )
48. AnonyGrl | February 28, 2011 at 6:39 am

LOL!!!
49. Richard A. Jernigan | February 28, 2011 at 7:04 am

And why don't we take up a collection to have Sam's Club send the Weeper of the House a couple pallets of Kleenex!
50. Chris in Lathrop | February 28, 2011 at 7:49 am

The Waltons aren't very community friendly. Better to go with Costco (so far as I know).
51. Coronal | February 28, 2011 at 8:26 am

I seem to remember hearing back in the day that DOMA was written without a severability clause. If so, and if any portion is overturned, then the whole thing collapses. Does
anyone know if this is correct?
52. Kathleen | February 28, 2011 at 8:36 am

As far as I know, the lack of a severability clause doesn't necessarily mean than the sections can't be struck down independently. If it were the case that striking down one section necessarily strikes down the entire law, then we should have seen that in Tauro's decision in the Mass DOMA cases.
53. Maggie4NoH8 | February 28, 2011 at 8:39 am

Those fancy-pants over at the NOM Blog have another action item where we can write to Boehner, Cantor and our respective representatives…

BUT, they have Boehner listed as the "house minority leader" and Cantor listed as the "house minority whip"!

Is that a typo? Or did they do that on purpose (as in, the majority of the House believes DOMA is unconstitutional, and Boehnor/Cantor are TRULY the minority leaders in this arena)?

LMFAO!!!!

I tried to paste a screen print, but I can't…

However, the next best thing is a link (feel free to use their tool to write your own letter opposing the House taking action to defend DOMA – I SURE DID!)…
http://www.nationformarriage.org/c.omL2KeN0LzH/b….
54. Maggie4NoH8 | February 28, 2011 at 9:19 am

Oh – here is my letter:

I have long believed DOMA, along with any state law or constitutional amendment defining marriage as between one man/one woman, is in violation of the Constitution of the United States.

I learned last week that the President and the DOJ will decline to defend lawsuits challenging the constitutionality of Section III of DOMA (at least in the second circuit) and applaud their decision.

And I learned just today that Senator Leahy announced he will co-sponsor Senator Diane Feinstein's repeal of DOMA.

I hope you will join the Senators, Representative Nadler (who will re-introduce the DOMA repeal bill, Respect for Marriage Act, that had 128 co-sponsors in the last Congress), our President and Attorney General, in working towards a full repeal of DOMA in the near future.
55. Sagesse | February 28, 2011 at 10:22 am

Gotta luv the interwebs :).
56. Straight for Equalit | March 1, 2011 at 2:58 am

Thanks Maggie4NoH8! I modified your letter and sent it from NOM's site.
57. Kate | March 1, 2011 at 3:25 am

Do we know for sure that while using NOM's site for this it's obvious that the e-mail is in oppostion? My fear is that the recipents just see the NOM headers and count our responses (without even reading them) as pro-NOM.
58. Mark M. (Seattle) | March 1, 2011 at 3:06 am

Got a nice response from Chili's this morning….probably an auto-reply but nice just the same

Dear Mr. M,

Thank you for your wonderful comments regarding Chili's. We enjoy hearing from our valued guests and we certainly appreciate your feedback.

We thank you for your patronage and we will look forward to your next visit. It will be our pleasure to serve you.

Sincerely,
Chili's Guest Relations
59. AnonyGrl | March 1, 2011 at 3:14 am

That rocks! I do SO hope that Kelly Grube got the same autoresponse.

Tee Hee!
60. Mark M. (Seattle) | March 1, 2011 at 3:32 am

I hope so too!
hehehehehehe
61. Kathleen | March 1, 2011 at 3:36 am

Amusing take on Imperial County's renewed attempt to intervene in Perry, from Clarknt67 at Daily Kos. http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/02/28/950736/-…!
62. Kathleen | March 1, 2011 at 3:37 am

I should clarify – I don't find it amusing that these bigots keep trying – simply amused by the characterization.
63. _BK_ | July 28, 2011 at 12:47 am

Oh, I find it amusing. In a darker, more sinister kind of way, though. It's fun to laugh at their failures. At least, I think it is. 🙂
64. LCH | March 1, 2011 at 4:58 am

Whoot!I got a personal reply back from Chili's. They have def. got my business. Here's what I got:

March 1, 2011

Dear Mrs. Hawkins,

Thank you for your email and your interest in Chili’s.

We can confirm that Chili’s does support the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force. Chili’s prides ourselves in giving back to the community, and this organization is one we have chosen to support.

We appreciate your feedback and your loyalty. We will look forward to your next visit and the opportunity to provide you with a great dining experience.

Sincerely,

Guest Relations

Reference Number: 536066
65. smithers | March 2, 2011 at 12:23 pm

you cannot normalize homosexuality. it is a perversion of human behavior. it always has been and it always will be. even if states legalize gay marriage, that doesn't make it right. it only makes it legal – that's all. homosexuality will always remain unnatural, deviant and twisted. if you want to live your life that way, go ahead but don't expect the rest of us to accept it as normal.
66. Ronnie | March 2, 2011 at 12:38 pm

Homosexuality is normalized & legal….GET OVER IT!!!!….It is not a perversion of human behavior….GET OVER IT!!!!…It is the human behavior of people who are Homosexual. It always has been and it always will be. Gay marriage is right & none of your business unless you are gay. Homosexuality will always remain natural & normal…If it occurs in nature then that means is it natural you benighted troglodyte…..Twisted would be what you are, a soulless BIGOT!!!…..I don't want to live my life any way other then how I was born to be…DEAL WITH IT!!!!…. > I …Ronnie
67. AnonyGrl | March 2, 2011 at 12:39 pm

Just out of curiousity… have you READ any of the stuff around here? Have you taken a moment to look at what we have to say, what we think, what we feel, or have you just come in here to be obnoxious and insulting and rude without a thought?

I suggest taking a few moments, or even a few days, to read some of the posts around here. We discuss, at great length sometimes, the implications of the various court cases and laws currently being debated in this country, the aspects of various discrimination that occurs on a daily basis, the lives that are impacted by people who think (or, perhaps fail entirely to think) as you do.

Frankly, I don't give a damn whether you or "the rest of us" whoever the heck that might be, accept any of us (and I KNOW who that us is) as "normal". It makes not one lick of difference in the long run what you think in your own little world.

What I do demand is equality.

That you think of homosexuality as a "perversion of human behavior" means less than nothing in the grand scheme of things.

So, stick around, or run off and go back to hiding under whatever rock you crawled out from under, I don't much care. But you might just find that if you DO take the time to get to know us, instead of just making bigoted assumptions and rude comments, that you might just learn a thing or two. Entirely up to you.
68. _BK_ | July 28, 2011 at 12:49 am

If I may answer your first paragraph for him…

*ahem*

Nope.
69. Richard A. Jernigan | March 2, 2011 at 12:58 pm

Actually, there is great scientific proof that being born gay IS normal. And even Rabbi Yoshua ben Yosef of Nazareth stated that there are some who are born this way, and he called us children of G-d and Blessed of G-d. So please, go back and study some more. You do not have to accept it, that is your right. However, that does NOT give you the right to codify your own personal moral code into the civil laws of this land, and it does NOT give you the right, or give anyone else the right, to codify bigotry and hatred into the laws.
70. Sheryl Carver | March 2, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Ah, AnonyGrl & Richard, you are two of the folks here who are my heroes! I would love to be able to be so centered yet strong when dealing with people who are so incredibly anti-equality. And that's the kindest way to describe them. Others here are also as effective – don't know how you all do it. I too easily go straight to anger, which is not effective at all. (Unless punching someone in the nose would be helpful, in which case I'm your go-to person!)

Well, maybe someday I'll be able to emulate your responses. Until then, I'll avoid actually being within arm's length of these irrational blankety-blanks.
71. AnonyGrl | March 2, 2011 at 2:39 pm

Thanks!

Sometimes, when I encounter someone like this, it makes me just want to burst into tears.

Not usually because I am hurt by it (although that happens too) but that it is so SAD to see someone who is missing knowing all the wonderful people that prejudice keeps him isolated from.

So I try not to get angry with them right off, though I will if they insist on pressing it and continuing with the insults, but am just so, so sorry for them.

And I know that some people have come to see the error of their ways, and I hope that this guy DOES hang around, and can learn and grow too.

Wouldn't THAT be great? Because it is kind of wonderful when an enemy turns out to be a friend, isn't it?

🙂
72. Richard A. Jernigan | March 3, 2011 at 12:08 am

Thanks, Sheryl Carver! Of course, as my husband can tell you, I usually only arrive at those calm centered moments after I have ranted all over the house to clear out all of my "Traffic Yiddish" and break a few non-precious items that can easily be replaced. But I do try to remain calm and rational here, and for the most part, I succeed. However, you can also find some posts on here where I have not been nearly so calm and collected, and have really cut loose on some of the idiots who absolutely refuse to see reason.
73. Rhie | March 4, 2011 at 10:17 am

blah blah bigotry blah blah unsubstantiated claim blah blah ignorance blah blah more bigotry. Basically, the same thing the last dozen or so trolls said. None of you think for yourselves, clearly.
74. AIC | July 27, 2011 at 10:16 pm

I would never help a battle buddy who's gay. They simply don't have values that coexist with mine.
75. Erkhyan | July 27, 2011 at 11:37 pm

You're right, a gay soldier probably has better values than you do, since they want to serve their country serve by your side, to be allowed to protect you and expect to be protected in return. Except, you just said you wouldn't. What's the matter, AIC, do they need to pay you, mercenary-style, to expect you to perform your duty?

– Franck P. Rabeson
Days spent apart from my fiancé because of DOMA: 1497 days, as of today.
76. AIC | July 27, 2011 at 10:26 pm

I am not for equal equality to all. That's veering on c0mmunism.
77. Erkhyan | July 27, 2011 at 11:44 pm

If you're willing to consider the extremes… Well, equality for all is communism, and what you prefer is medieval feudalism. Not considering that the countries considered to be the best to live in, are the ones based on equality and respect.

– Franck P. Rabeson
Days spent apart from my fiancé because of DOMA: 1497 days, as of today.
78. AIC | July 27, 2011 at 10:27 pm

I'm glad the president has opened up his eyes and kept DOMA on the books for the fags in the military. Now, all they can do is proclaim they are gay and not be kicked out. DOMA is here to stay, you can be sure of it.
79. _BK_ | July 28, 2011 at 12:55 am

Please, don't use inflammatory language. Surprisingly, it is actually possible to state one's opinions without using derogatory and/or vulgar terms. But please, ask all the questions you want, and we'll give you answers to the best of our ability.